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Caught in a funk
Funk Shawn Helvey Funk Shawn Helvey

Caught in a funk

Just now, as I continue to work on a blog post I began writing almost two weeks ago, I recognize I’ve been in a bit of a funk. Nothing drastic, but I am aware that I have not been spending quality time grounding myself.

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Daily practices
Mindfulness Shawn Helvey Mindfulness Shawn Helvey

Daily practices

Each moment of every day we perform actions which, when put together, make up who we are. The vast majority are rooted somewhere outside our momentary awareness, guided by all the experiences, knowledge, and feelings we have acquired up to this point.

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Transforming relationships
Relationships Shawn Helvey Relationships Shawn Helvey

Transforming relationships

When I was in college, I worked for what seemed like an eternity as a waiter to pay the bills. The flexibility, high pay relative to other entry-level positions, and especially the social climate were extremely attractive to me fresh out of high school.

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Nice guys finish last
Kindness Shawn Helvey Kindness Shawn Helvey

Nice guys finish last

For the last few years, I had a close friend in my life who has been waging a war against being “nice.” He would become annoyed whenever I exhibited this particular behavior, and it often left me feeling judged and rejected. How could somebody tell me that I was wrong to be nice when all I was trying to do was treat people with respect?

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Pride and gratitude
Pride, Spirituality Shawn Helvey Pride, Spirituality Shawn Helvey

Pride and gratitude

I’ve spent a good amount of time in my life believing that I could or should be working to a point where I no longer feel anger. Spiritually, I’ve believed anger to be a selfish emotion used to get what it wants by force.

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Resentment
Anger Shawn Helvey Anger Shawn Helvey

Resentment

While being good for nothing may or may not be true about war, I can say with certainty that it isn’t about anger. Anger gives us information that we can use to understand how to protect ourselves.

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Anger - What is it good for?
Anger Shawn Helvey Anger Shawn Helvey

Anger - What is it good for?

I’ve spent a good amount of time in my life believing that I could or should be working to a point where I no longer feel anger. Spiritually, I’ve believed anger to be a selfish emotion used to get what it wants by force.

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Think back
Exploration, Teens Shawn Helvey Exploration, Teens Shawn Helvey

Think back

One of the most valuable exercises that can be done to understand our reaction to our teen is to look at our beliefs and values that formed as a result of that time in our own lives. To do this effectively, we must be as objective as possible and this can be tricky.

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Navigating uncertainty
Fear, Teens Shawn Helvey Fear, Teens Shawn Helvey

Navigating uncertainty

In our lives, uncertainty is most often associated with fear. When we don’t know what will happen, our minds can run amok and, if left unchecked, can lead to regular thoughts of what we imagine will be the worst possible outcome.

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Encourage instead of shame
Shame, Mentoring Shawn Helvey Shame, Mentoring Shawn Helvey

Encourage instead of shame

When I think of the best coaches, mentors, and bosses I’ve had in my life, they’ve all created a balance between being encouraging and maintaining accountability. In the environment this creates, I felt safe to make mistakes but also driven to be better.

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Be mindful of your words
Conversation, Parenting Shawn Helvey Conversation, Parenting Shawn Helvey

Be mindful of your words

When you become a parent, you are thrust into a relationship with a person who constantly needs you and from whom you are not able to take much space. Add to this that one of the major jobs of parenthood is to provide guidance to ensure your child grows up in the best way possible and it’s no wonder that sometimes words can come out in harsh ways.

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Stop fighting with your teenager
Conflict resolution, Teens Shawn Helvey Conflict resolution, Teens Shawn Helvey

Stop fighting with your teenager

It amazes me how often I hear that this is the hardest time to grow up as a teenager. The agreed upon culprit: social media. While I do think that growing up in a digital world adds novel challenges to the period of adolescence I’m amazed because, as far as I can tell, it’s always been tough to develop through the teen years.

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